Episode 58 – The Person I Admire Shouldn’t Be Sad

“Let us end it here……”

My wife, Risa, in the online game [GFO] said goodbye to me.

It was sudden.

When I asked her why, she simply said [I’m sick of you right now] but she didn’t tell me what the cause was.

Since then, I haven’t been able to get in touch with her until today.

I wanted to know what’s wrong with me, but there’s no way to know what she really meant when she just said it and left.

The following day, when I went to school on Friday, I couldn’t get any study done, and even though I was writing a novel, I could only write negative things.

Meanwhile, my childhood friend and the gyaru were giving me cold stares, and I haven’t had any contact with Idol sama like i used to, and i only greeted her.

At home, my step sister, who has come to cook dinner for me, was concerned about my lack of energy, but I couldn’t say anything about what’s going on in the game, so I covered it up with a bitter smile.

The other day, I thought I had to get my act together, and I’m sure my step sister will hate me again if I’m like this.

With a wry smile on my face, I spent the rest of the day in a hazy mood, and before I knew it, it was Saturday.

I managed to move my heavy body at the usual time and went to my favorite coffee shop. I was supposed to have a meeting with Aigou san.

Normally I would be looking forward to seeing the mature and cool Aigou san which was rude to Tamio, but I was motivated and looking forward to it, but today, even that was a bother.

Still, work is work.

I had to let it go or I would never be able to get anything done.

When I arrived at the coffee shop and was shown to my usual seat, I ordered a morning set breakfast.

My childhood friend was at work again today, but she didn’t come to take my order.

She looked at me with the same cold look as she did at school.

……What the hell?

I opened my laptop and checked my manuscript, while feeling uncomfortable with the way she looked at me.

“Thank you for waiting ! ! Here’s the Morning Set ! !”

My childhood friend brought the item that I had ordered.

Her voice was somewhat harsh and angry, which surprised me as I was staring at my computer.

“T-thank you. …….”

I couldn’t hide my surprise at my childhood friend’s attitude so I stopped typing and looked at her face.

Her expression was smiling, but her eyes weren’t smiling at all.

“Please take your time ! !”

I looked at her back as she said that and left my seat with a quick step, ……What did I do? and I think back to the crime that  I don’t even remember.

But nothing comes to mind.

Then I wonder what’s wrong with her attitude…..

I had no idea why my childhood friend and Risa were making me their enemy.

“I give up…….”

Eventually I stopped thinking about it because it didn’t give me any answers, even if I’m thinking about it.

Then, about an hour after I started again to continue writing, Aigou san came over.

She was dressed neatly in a suit, just as she had been the last time we had met, and she’s still beautiful.

“Good morning, Matsudaira sensei.”

“G-good morning……..”

Unlike the childhood friend I met earlier, Aigou san greeted me with a friendly smile, which made me nervous.

“Hm? Sensei, did you cut your hair?”

“Y-yes……, I cut it. No, technically speaking, I was the one who was being cut off.”

“Hee….. That’s good. It looks good on you, Sensei ! !”

“T-thank you very much.”

I scratched my head to hide my embarrassment after being praised for getting a haircut, and I felt something like a murderous intend coming from behind Aigou san’s back.

“Are you ready to order?”

My childhood friend with a Hannya-like expression puts on a terrifying smile and takes Aigou san’s order.

“Eh, ah, then I’d like some hot coffee, please.”

“O-oi ! !”

I got angry at my childhood friend’s disrespectful attitude toward Aigou san who probably hasn’t decided what to order yet, and when I spoke up, my childhood friend glared at me …… but immediately turned back toward Aigou san and said [Sure thing. Take your time ! !] and leave the seat.

Aigou san looked at me with a dumbfounded expression, but when I muttered [That girl…..] she rested her elbows on the desk, rested her chin on her hand, and looked at me happily.

“…..What is it?”

Seeing the look on my face, I was so angry at my childhood friend’s attitude and embarrassed to be laughed at that I acted rashly.

“You know her?”

“Yes, she’s a childhood friend of mine……”

When I replied with a sulky face, Aigou san said [fuun] and looked at my childhood friend.

The expression on my childhood friend’s face hasn’t cleared up yet , and she’s still working in a dissatisfied manner. She glanced at me from time to time and turned her head away as soon as our eyes met.

This strange attitude makes me more and more angry, but even so, Aigou san seems to be enjoying herself.

“That girl, it seems like she likes you….”

“Huh, there’s no way, no way ! !”

Surprised by her absurd statement, I turned to Aigou san and immediately denied it.

Seeing my behavior, Aigou san gave me a puzzled look and asked [Why?].

…..It’s because i know why.

I’m not the one that my childhood friend likes.

It’s “Matsudaira Riku” who’s a writer, her childhood friend and her destined partner. However, such things were only an illusion.

The repeated changes in attitude over the past few days must’ve been the result of facing the reality that the true identity of the person she thought was destined to be with her was not like she expected.

“….She hates me. So there’s no way that she likes me.”

“why would you think that, mind if you tell Onee san about it?”

Her eyes still sparkle with curiosity even after she hears my words, and I tell her about what has happened with my childhood friend recently.

I told her about the day we met again, at school, at the book signing, after I cut my hair, and other things that had happened in the past few days in a way so that my childhood friend wouldn’t hear me.

Aigou san listened to me in silence.

“That’s why she doesn’t like me.”

I assured her at the end.

I can’t make my childhood friend’s fantasy come true, and I won’t even try to make it come true.  I believe that no one would ever like me like that.

“Is that so? I don’t think she hates you….”

‘No, that’s not true. That girl…… no, no one would ever like me.”

I looked down at her words and said negative things.

When I think back on my life up until now, my childhood friend’s sudden change, the incident on the net game, Idol sama and my step sister, i  become negative.

“Hey you〜. You shouldn’t be so down on yourself. If you do that, you’ll only be able to see yourself, and you won’t be able to recognize the goodwill of others.”

Her face, which had been smiling happily just a few minutes earlier, began to become cloudy.

“Like me……..”

I didn’t understand what she meant when she said that at the end.