The Matchmaker Tool Is Uncooperative

“Gu Xuedi, I didn’t expect to meet you here.”

Wu Siyuan smiled faintly. “Neither do I, Xuege.” He said no more but tilted his neck and looked around instead. As if he was expecting to see someone else besides Jiang Jingtong.

To be able to chat with him should have been a great blessing for Gu Siyuan. Yet looking at the Junior who seemed to be distracted and ignored his presence, Jiang Jingtong couldn’t help but feel slightly offended. 

“Who are you looking for?”

Wu Siyuan immediately replied, “What a pity, I thought I could see Shi Xuege with you. I just met him today. He’s truly a wonderful person!”

Jiang Jingtong felt his hair stand on end at the mention of Shi Yuanbai’s name, as he was fully aware of what he was about to do. His mind went blank for a moment.

In the end, he reluctantly put on a smile and asked tentatively, “Which Shi Xuege are you talking about…?”

There were not many people with the surname Shi in their college. Obviously, he should have guessed Shi Yuanbai directly. But as someone with ulterior motives, he’d also have a fluke mentality, trying to prove the slightest possibility;  just in case not what he thought of.

Meanwhile, looking at the drop of sweat appearing on Jiang Jingtong’s forehead, Wu Siyuan smiled meaningfully. ‘This person’s psychological quality is quite poor. Does this mean he’s having a guilty conscience right now?’

“Naturally, the Shi Xuege I mean is Shi Yuanbai!” Wu Siyuan pretended to ask curiously, “Jiang Xuege, could it be…you know other Shi Xuege?”

At this point, Jiang Jingtong really didn’t want to stay here for a moment longer. Since the first greeting, for some reason, he felt as if his inner thought was laid bare in front of Gu Siyuan. 

He just laughed wryly. “How could I? Of course, I only know one.” 

Immediately after, he made an excuse to slip away.

 ***

Chen Xuyao, his roommate whose family was on par with Jiang Jingtong, approached him and asked, “What is that guy doing here?” 

His expression was a bit stern, with his brows furrowed tightly. He looked in the direction Jiang Jingtong left with undisguised repulsion in his eyes.

“I don’t know. He looks like he’s harboring bad intentions.” Wu Siyuan shrugged. 

Chen Xuyao heaved a sigh of relief. “That’s it, just stay vigilant. Listen, that guy is no good. Even if he hasn’t done anything illegal, his conduct isn’t praiseworthy either, do you understand?”

Wu Siyuan nodded in acquiescence. “It’s funny, he seemed to be scared away just now? Didn’t I just mention Shi Yuanbai’s name? What is he afraid of? Aren’t they classmates and are said to be close friends?”

Wu Siyuan and his other roommates walked to the dining table, put down their plates, and sat down. The other guys stared at his face intentionally or unintentionally. It’s Chen Xuyao who finally spoke up, “If before I thought it was just me, but now that you say it, it’s indeed a bit similar.”

Wu Siyuan, “What are you talking about?”

It’s a bit embarrassing to say out loud, but looking at the other two roommates who were unwilling to help, Chen Xuyao could only bite the bullet and continue by himself, “Your appearance, really looks like Shi Yuanbai a little bit. You know, the mighty Jiang Jingtong is, unfortunately, chasing after Shi Yuanbai without success. According to his Scumbag nature, he might find you to be a stand-in.”

“What the-!” Wu Siyuan was horrified.

Another roommate of his commented, “Alright! Seeing your reaction, it seems like we can rest assured that you won’t fall for his deception.”

Without covering the disgust in his tone, Wu Siyuan retorted, “Let’s forget about my sexual orientation, whether I like males in the first place or not. But Jiang Jingtong, does he think his appearance can be my dish?”

The others nodded vigorously. “Anyway, it’s good that you’re aware of what kind of scum he is.”

Having said that, Wu Siyuan actually thought, ‘It is exactly because he’s such a scum that he’s the perfect match for Shi Yuanbai’. The kind of rotten pots would have a rotten lid for a pair. In this life, they should be locked together at all costs. Didn’t Yuanbai plan to go abroad? Don’t worry, he could go to whatever country, but they needed to marry each other first and foremost!

Continuing their conversation, Wu Siyuan spoke his wonder, “Since Jiang Jiangtong loves Shi Yuanbai so much, to the point of craving a stand-in just to scrape any similarities, couldn’t he just make his feelings clear and tie the knot directly with Shi Yuanbai?”

Chen Xuyao snorted contemptuously. He seemed to understand the dynamic of those two’s relationships quite well. “You don’t really think that Shi Yuanbai is a decent person, do you? C’mon, Shi Yuanbai is a master of being ambiguous. Even right now perhaps he’s in the midst of fishing what kind of new potential stock.”

Wu Siyuan persuaded weakly, “Don’t say it like that. I’m still a CP fan of his with Jiang Jingtong.”

“Pffft!”

This unanticipated reveal resulted in Chen Xuyao spraying his drink in astonishment.

The guy himself, however, was inevitably moved by the statement. Looking back, he tried thinking about the matter from a different perspective.

Suddenly he seriously spoke, “Actually…the idea of them being a couple is marvelous. It may be a good measure to reduce the harm to other people.”

After the 4 guys finished their dinner, they began to walk to their dormitory together. 

On the way back, following what Chen Xuyao had admitted earlier, Wu Siyuan solemnly vowed as well. “That’s right, no matter what, JiangShi must be together, forever, ever after!”

One of his roommates was amused. “Is this the wistful thinking of CP fans speaking?”

Chen Xuyao also curiously asked, “Speaking of it, how can you be a CP fan of those two things[1]?”

Wu Siyuan honestly replied, “Maybe I’ve been brainwashed by the people around me before?”

The other 3 roommates, “…”

They tacitly dispersed, distancing themselves from Gu Siyuan.

No way! It’s dangerous! The power of CP fans apparently was that terrible! 

Well, fortunately, Gu Siyuan was still within the help. He hadn’t fallen to the point of believing any fart those two Scumbags let out and got himself deceived.

***

Now that Wu Siyuan had explained himself well and expressed his stance to his roommates, it’d be easier to implement his future plans, without any misunderstanding.

On the other hand, as expected of the legitimate member of the upper-class circle, Chen Xuyao was indeed familiar with Jiang Jingtong and Shi Yuanbai. He understood their nature and knew their affairs. While many of his peers in the circle had a good impression of Shi Yuanbai due to his excellent interpersonal skill, only a few of them weren’t. Those who had their own views like Chen Xuyao often were seen as merely envious of Shi Yuanbai.

Some people who had a good impression even simply refused to listen to any opposing views. Gu Siyuan, in the original plot, was such a person. As a result, he steadily plunged into the abyss of despair.

As Chen Xuyao talked about their affairs in the upper circle, Wu Siyuan was also trying to formulate more plans about how to press those two scumbags’ heads together.

What Shi Yuanbai cared about was his family’s business. How he could get the right of inheritance and become the chosen heir.

While Jiang Jingtong, his only concern was Shi Yuanbai, and that meant the problem of Shi Family’s inheritance. Only if Shi Yuanbai’s goal was taken care of, as long as Shi Yuanbai’s ambition was curbed, only then would Jiang Jingtong be able to embrace his White Moonlight.

Those two protagonists would still be together in the end even if they followed the normal trajectory. But Wu Siyuan’s task right now was to eliminate obstacles and reduce the bumpy part of their romance, which meant he must offer assistance to push them to the peak of Love, at any cost, including artificially triggering their feelings.

That’s why the Suspension Bridge Effect should be at play here.

Speaking of which, it seemed like there was another task he must do. First of all, he had to teach and guide Jiang Jingtong on how to capture Shi Yuanbai in his palm.

There’s not much time. Wu Siyuan had to make good use of this one year (before Shi Yuanbai graduated and decided to go abroad).

During the time, he’d definitely dedicate himself as their emotional mentor as well as a fanatic fanboy who spread JiangShi Love far and wide.

 ***

In regard to finance and business skills, he had to master them. In regard to human psychology, he needed to study hard. While in regard to the CP fan circle knowledge, he also had to learn well!

Wu Siyuan threw the newly bought financial-related study materials in his hand. 

He deeply realized the difficulty of life.

‘Screw them! I want to quit!’

He should have died and stayed far away from any worldly matter. But looking at him right now, what kind of Ghost who still had to work their ass off to study?! What kind of Heavenly Law is this?? 

Other transmigrators would become a Big Boss once they crossed over. But when it came to himself, he had to start from the grass root and learn about human psychology. Wu Siyuan suddenly felt unloved.

Gao Min, his roommate who was seriously playing games, glanced at his paralyzed form curiously.

He earnestly gave a piece of advice, “Actually, those books are useless. The more you read the more incomprehensible it is. The questions will never end until you put down the book.”

Wu Siyuan who was currently having a headache quickly nodded like a rattle in agreement. “You’re absolutely right!”

Sure enough, it’s better to just take a shower and sleep.

***

Finance could be understood with practice, but emotions could not. Even if he could set aside his finance learning for now, he still had to read a lot of Love Psychology material in order to fool Jiang Jingtong as his love mentor. 

Therefore, contrary to his original plan to sleep, Wu Siyuan turned on his mobile phone as he lay down in his bed. First, he registered another side account on Weibo. Next, browsing other emotional consultants’ posts and learned how to make his own post later. Lastly, he wrote a few lines of plausible chicken soup for the soul[2], and plastered some tranquil landscape pictures on his newly made side account.

Well done. 

He shut down his phone and finally went to sleep. 

***

There was a class Wu Siyuan had to take the next morning. On his way to the teaching building where his morning class was held, the God of Plague who should be avoided by thousands of miles a.k.a Jiang Jingtong, actually popped out once again.

As if he had forgotten any embarrassing incident last night, Jiang Jingtong smiled brightly at Wu Siyuan. “Gu Xuedi, what a serendipity.”

Wu Siyuan had to clutch the book in his hand tightly before flashing out a more dazzling smile in return. 

Unprepared to receive such a smile, Jiang Jingtong was caught off guard. His heart started to beat faster. 

However, the next words he heard broke his fantasy even faster.

“It is rare for us CP fans to meet the Righteous Masters[3], Jiang Xuege and Shi Xuege. So I have to ask you every day, Xuege, when will you officially be together?”

Wu Siyuan insisted that he was not embarrassed acting like a brainless CP Fan. The one who should be embarrassed must be someone else. For example, the guy whose expression had turned darker in front of him, Jiang Jingtong.

He must remind him repeatedly, that If he could get his hand on the real goods, there was no need to find any counterfeit. Now that this guy had delivered himself to the door by himself, how could Wu Siyuan let go of any chance to start his brainwashing?

Jiang Jingtong clenched his jaw and stiffly replied, “Thank you for your concern. Yuanbai and I are just friends, please don’t speak any nonsense.”

Wu Siyuan lamented, “Hey~ I’ve been waiting for so long, but you guys still haven’t reached your HE yet, alas…”

Then, scanning his gaze around the department building, he stood on tiptoe, looking like he was about to share a secret. “Let’s not talk about the two Xuege for now, our class is about to start. But to be honest, I can help Xuege to learn how to express your affection properly. Believe it or not, I have quite the experience.”

After delivering his first bait, Wu Siyuan waved his hand and left without turning back.

‘Stop right there! Who the hell said I don’t know how to show my affection?!’

Jiang Jingtong really wanted to shout and defend his dignity loud and clear, but he was afraid other people would hear and interpret it differently. In the end, he had no choice but to swallow his breath.

Truth be told, it was true that he had been chasing Shi Yuanbai for many years already, and there was no sign of improvement in their relationship. Shi Yuanbai kept him in a friend zone and refused to accept him as a full-time lover.

But if the problem was something that could easily be solved by nobody like Gu Siyuan, then he, Jiang Jingtong, shouldn’t have the need to find this guy as a substitute in the first place.

Jiang Jingtong chuckled, thinking he might be sick and had to go to the hospital, if he were to actually believe Gu Siyuan’s nonsense.

That being said, Jiang Jingtong couldn’t resist his brain to analyze the possibility.

Thinking about it carefully, in the case where Gu Siyuan was truly capable as he boasted, then his move in approaching Gu Siyuan would hit 2 birds with one stone. Not only could he soothe his yearning temporarily by taking Gu Siyuan as a substitute, but he could also find a way to bring Shi Yuanbai into his arms. No matter from which angle he looked at it, there’s nothing wrong with indulging Gu Siyuan’s whims to be his Love Mentor.   

Then, so be it. Anyway, coaxing this junior who could be brainwashed by miscellaneous ideas must be easy peasy. Jiang Jingtong was confident about his charm and ability.

***

In the classroom, Chen Xuyao ​​and the others had already been waiting for Wu Siyuan for quite a while.

“Why did he come to you again?”

Wu Siyuan grinned and shared his gain, “It’s okay. I found a new job, to be an Emotional Counselor, what do you think?”

Gao Min, “Who are you going to give a consultation for?”

Wu Siyuan quickly answered with confidence, “Of course, it’s our Honorable Jiang Xuege!”

Chen Xuyao ​​squinted his eyes at him. “You? Becoming his counselor?”

To this question, Wu Siyuan raised his chin and answered in a dignified manner, “Although I have no practical experience, I have more than sufficient theoretical experience.”

Another roommate of his, Feng Jiazhen, was skeptical, “What if you misled him?”

“Then, it’s better than me being misled by him!”

When the 3 roommates, Chen Xuyao, Gao Min, and Feng Jiazhen heard his assertive answer, they thought, ‘It makes sense.’

Chen Xuyao smacked his shoulder. “That’s it! Then you have my full support.”

He ​​sincerely hoped the day those two Scumbags embraced each other would be in the near future. If Gu Siyuan’s plan were to bear fruits, it must be of great merit to the whole world!

***

During class, Wu Siyuan opened his phone to relieve boredom. There was an unfamiliar number contacting him.

[Do you really think I can successfully pursue him?]

Looking at the chat content, Wu Siyuan immediately knew who the sender was. He replied shortly,

[Of course. As long as you listen and follow my advice without fail.]