Florida Man's General Store in Cultivation World



Chapter 58 – Florida Man Destroys Illegally Parked Wooden Boat, Kills the Ship Owners

Hua Jiashan, Wu Buyi, Han Hao, Han Meng, and Tiger Swordsman observed the situation on a massive flying sword 10 kilometers away from the store. They had been watching Leo ever since the lightning storm turned purple.

Aside from Hua Jiashan, everybody sweated profusely. They had gone through a heaven tribulation at least once in their lifetime, but nobody had seen purple lightning bolts.

"Why are the lightning bolts purple, sect master? Do you know anything?" Asked Han Hao.

Hua Jiashan deeply exhaled. He reminisced about the past, "It's the same tribulation as the soul transformation stage ascension. You should be prepared for it."

"Soul Transformation Ascension?"

The elders nodded as they understood the term. After the nascent soul stage, every major realm advancement required them to go through a deadly heaven tribulation.

The prerequisite of the soul formation stage was getting hit by green lightning bolts. To get to the soul transformation stage, one had to overcome the purple lightning, which was capable of destroying any weak soul formation cultivators upon touch.

Hua Jiashan explained the ranks of heaven tribulation to everybody here.

"As fellow mortals, we have to overcome heaven's trials to attain immortality. Transparent Heaven Tribulation got us to the nascent soul stage. The Nature Tribulation made us… I mean, me… a soul formation cultivator. The purple one represents Poisonous and Hypocrisy that can torment soul formation cultivators' minds and break them. It tested your character as a human if you are determined enough to reach the next stage, which I have already failed once."

From Hua Jiashan's experience, the purple heaven tribulation's specialty was the power to inflict great pain and confusion on the cultivators. Every strike from heaven could potentially make grown men and a geezer like him beg for death because of the excruciating pain.

Hua Jiashan deeply sighed as he gazed at Leo in envy. He was certain that the latter was not a soul formation cultivator but a quasi-immortal or someone with a higher status, judging how he overcame the purple lightning bolts with ease.

"I witnessed how Situ Nantian went through a similar heaven tribulation years ago. After the purple tribulation, there is the Gold Tribulation. One strike from the yellow heaven was a hundred times stronger than 100 purple lightning strikes. I still couldn't believe how Situ Nantian survived heaven's onslaught that day. Did you know that the south of our continent wasn't a peninsula 500 years ago? There were a dozen provinces back then, but everything sank into the sea after Situ Nantian advanced to the quasi-immortal stage. The Gold Tribulation Lightning destroyed everything."

"…"

The elders gasped in shock and astonishment. As they were a lot younger than Hua Jiashan, they couldn't imagine what the mainland's map was like before Situ Nantian and the heavenly tribulation destroyed a portion of the land.

RUMBLE

While they chatted, the black clouds dispersed. Leo already got down from the rooftop and put on some clothes. He then reached out to collect the pills.

Hua Jiashan gazed at the empty sky. However, his eyes saw hundreds of cultivators from the north and south, rushing toward the general store at a frightening speed. He deeply sighed.

"The hyenas have arrived. We have to go in and help our friend. Right? Wu Buyi?"

Wu Buyi, who had been standing behind Hua Jiashan, dryly laughed. He was embarrassed, "T-That's right, sect master. He's our ally. He has been providing aid to our disciples. We must return the favor. Also, his store has a lot of good stuff. Speaking of which, I still need to concoct some Longevity Pill since I got plenty of immortal grass from Daoist Florida Man."

"…"

Hua Jiashan gave Wu Buyi a meaningful look. He knew that the guest alchemist was greedy. However, as Han Hao and Wu Buyi were sworn brothers, he left the guy be.

WHOOSH

The flying sword rushed toward the store. In a few seconds, it covered five kilometers. However, the greedy cultivators from the north and south already reached the place. They started shouting.

"HAND OVER THE IMMORTAL PILLS!!"

The voice was so loud that Hua Jiashan and everybody could hear it from afar. Their expression turned dark.

Tiger Swordsman recognized the owner of the voice. He grumbled, "That's Bo Cai, the Mountain Bandit King. I don't know if he's stupid or reckless, but he's only a nascent soul cultivator. Why is he trying to provoke Daoist Florida Man?"

Han Meng shook his head, "He probably thought that Daoist Florida Man is not in full condition after transcending the purple heaven tribulation. Well, he's a thief. I doubt his intelligence is half of a baboon."

Hua Jiashan snorted. He taught the elders, "Remember. When we cultivate, we improve our physique and physical strength. For example, if I'm injured, I'm still a soul formation stage cultivator by its core. My punch still holds the same strength. Even if my Qi is depleted, one or two punches are enough to kill a nascent soul cultivator!"

Everybody nodded. They learned the lesson by heart as they never challenged a stronger foe regardless of how injured they were.

"That's right. An injured tiger is still a tiger. A rabbit can't possibly kill an injured tiger no matter how hard it tries."

Again, Hua Jiashan bitterly sighed, "Unless those rabbits are carnivorous and they come in groups."

"…"

"Another lesson for you. When facing foes with a weaker cultivation base, you must account for their number. If they have ten or more people, you can easily win. If they have a hundred people, you must utilize strategies and avoid fighting all of them at once. Against a thousand, you must flee!"

"Y-Yes, sect master."

As they listened to Hua Jiashan, they noticed an infamous celebrity among the northern people. Han Meng was the first to notice the guy.

Among the flying ships from the north, one of them carried the insignia of the Ouyang Clan. Moreover, it was a luxurious cruiser ship that could house over a thousand cultivators.

"That ship… Isn't that from the Ouyang Clan's main headquarters?!"

Everybody's face turned white, especially Han Hao. He thought that Ouyang Zi came here personally.

"Is Ouyang Zi there? Is he coming for Daoist Florida Man?!"

Hua Jiashan narrowed his eyes, scanning the ship from afar. A moment later, he shook his head.

"No. I don't sense Ouyang Zi or Ouyang Ke on that ship. No soul transformation cultivator is onboard."

Hearing that the scary guys were not around, everybody let out a long sigh of relief. Still, there were two hundred nascent soul cultivators and a dozen soul formation cultivators there.

Wu Buyi widely grinned as he didn't see any quasi-immortal or strong guys among the crowd. He laughed, "I guess we don't have to do anything after all."

"Why?" Han Hao and others squinted their brows and stared at the alchemist.

Wu Buyi mimicked Leo's fingers-napping posture, "Trust me. He only needs one snap to kill everybody. Sect Master, can you hang back and keep the flying sword higher? We don't want to miss the show."

"???"

Hua Jiashan was puzzled by Wu Buyi's strange behavior. Thus, he turned his attention to Leo and rescanned the latter's cultivation base.

The next minute, Hua Jiashan dropped his jaw.

"Your friend... has no cultivation base?!"

"WHAT?!"

"No… This is not it!"

Hua Jiashan could differentiate between quasi-immortals and soul transformation cultivators as he had seen them in action. However, Leo's constitution was a lot different from those men.

Leo's body didn't gather Qi or essence from the surroundings. On the contrary, his body PRODUCED Qi and element essence, filling the environment with his strange aura. The area around the store was filled with dense essence!

There was only one explanation.

"A True Immortal! A Celestial Being! That man is not a mortal!"

"!!!"

.

.

Leo pursed his lips and smiled at the crowd. He grabbed another pill in his hand and popped it in his mouth.

"So, what are you going to do about it? This is my snack."

Although the crowd bickered and yelled at each other, they didn't forget that Leo was still in possession of immortal pills. They bellowed at him when Leo started eating more pills.

"GIVE IT HERE!"

One of the flying ships dove down. A dozen nascent soul cultivators jumped off and brandished their weapons, charging at Leo.

The Florida Man didn't do anything fancy. He kept chewing immortal pills as if they were popcorn.

Ten spearheads and ten swords, cladded in element Qi, hit Leo's head, but none of them penetrated his skin.

DING

DING

DING

<You have been attacked.>

Leo widely grinned. He ignored the people and activated the shop domain system, revealing their lifespan.

"Thank you very much, dear customers," Laughed Leo.

"Huh?"

As usual, Leo commanded the system to take their lifespan in his mind. The group of 20 nascent soul cultivators saw their numbers decrease to zero instantly, but they failed to comprehend what had happened – Their bodies dried and disintegrated into dust.

DING

<Your lifespan has increased by 14,154 years, 1 Month, 5 Days, 20 Hours, and 52 Minutes.>

Leo couldn't stop smiling. Killing thieves and hoodlums was more profitable than selling goodies. He wondered how many cultivators would be stupid enough to attack him again.

"So?" Leo looked at the crowd from above.

Unfortunately, the previous diving flying ship was unmanned. It fell on top of Leo.

"…"

Leo's expression turned stiff. He raised his free hand and caught the bow of the ship.

BOOM

The ship stopped moving. Leo silently held the 100-meter-long wooden ship with one hand and stared at the weird vehicle.

"Umm, excuse me, dear customers. You cannot park your ship on top of my head. Please think logically before you drive. Rather, do you even have a boat license?"

Leo jumped up 200 meters in the sky, appearing 200 meters away from Ouyang Feng's cruiser ship. While he still held the ship. He lightly flickered his fingers and knocked the ship.

BOOM

The finger flick shattered the entire ship into fragments. Shrapnel, wood pieces, and random objects scattered everywhere and flew toward the massive ship of Ouyang.

Small wooden planks hit Ouyang Feng's crew. The young master also got hit by a small piece of metal, but he didn't flinch.

Everybody stopped bickering and glared at Leo. They reevaluated his condition, but none of them could measure his true strength.

While floating in the sky, Leo gave Ouyang Feng a meaningful look. As his hand was freed, he grabbed three more pills and shoved them in his mouth. He loudly chewed them to troll the young master.

"So… What's your problem again?"

"…"

Leo didn't wait for Ouyang Feng to respond. As he didn't know how to fly, he descended and landed on top of his store building. Instead of sinking through the roof tiles upon landing, the tiles shone and created a thin layer of barrier, protecting the tiles from Leo's weight and momentum.

After the rough landing, Leo picked three more pills to eat. He looked away from Ouyang Feng and gazed at the crowd from the south.

"What about you? What did you say again? I remember that there was a Genshin Impact fan among the crowd. Where is the Fatui?"

"…"

.

.

Wu Buyi burst into laughter while Hua Jiashan, Han Hao, and others were speechless. They had never seen Leo in action before, and they were curious how he turned 20 nascent soul cultivators into ash without touching them.

"Yeah, he's an immortal, alright," Hua Jiashan nodded.

Han Hao was curious, "Have you seen an immortal before, sect master?"

"Just a glimpse, but I can't say how strong an immortal truly is."

"I see."

Wu Buyi patted Han Hao's shoulder and pointed at Leo, "Look no further, friend. Witness the greatness of my business partner! BEHOLD… THE DAO OF FLORIDA!"

"… You don't even know what Florida means," Han Hao facepalmed and shook his head.

Meanwhile, Hua Jiashan pondered, trying to figure out the true meaning of "Florida".

'What is Florida? Is it a unique plant, place, name, or a mystic art that I don't know about?'