I'm a Villainess, Can I Die?

Chapter 84

When I came to think of it, it seemed that something like ‘monster’ came out of Lucas’s mouth when he was talking with the old nobles yesterday.

Monsters… I knew absolutely nothing about monsters.

Of course, no ‘monster’ had ever appeared in the novel, and all the information I knew was based on that poor novel, so I had no choice but to not know.

I tilted my head and looked at Lucas, who slowly nodded and opened his mouth again.

“Twelve years ago, there was a huge monster subjugation. They gathered people from all over the empire and waged war.”

This was also the first time I had heard of that. If you were to cram romance and conflicts caused by the villain into a single book, there would have been no room for events of the past to appear.

‘What a useless book.’

I listened to the story in silence.

“It was a war that took place where the monsters took root, in the forest of the north of the empire. The bloody battle between monsters and humans continued for almost a year. They killed each other without taking a day off. The victors of that brutal battle were the humans.”

For an instant, the look on Lucas’s face when he said that seemed very bitter.

“Even though unfortunate sacrifices followed, the monster subjugation ended successfully and brought peace to humans. After the war, less than 10 reports of monsters have been received so far. Even that was received within a year or two after the subjugation.”

It was unfortunate that people were sacrificed, but it was clear that it was a happy ending from winning the war and gaining peace.

Yes, that would have been the case until now.

It was predictable that things had gone awry, given that Lucas told this story when I asked why my family members looked tired.

Sure enough, Lucas’s expression hardened and started talking about the false peace.

“It certainly was. At least when it comes to monsters, we have maintained peace. But lately, that peace has suddenly started to crack.”

“Suddenly, so…”

My murmur followed Lucas’s words.

“The monsters started appearing again.”

There was silence for a while.

Silence always lingered behind an important and shocking story, and this was exactly that sort of situation.

Lucas quenched his thirst with his tea and spoke again.

“There is a military corps dedicated to managing monsters. The military corps is located in the north, which was the base of the monsters. If even the smallest traces of monsters are found, they are to annihilate them again.”

“They’re doing that, but the monsters are becoming a problem again?”

“Yes. Monsters suddenly started appearing in unexpected places. Not in the north, but the capital. And next to that is…”

“The White Estate.”

“That’s right. Well, to be more precise, the White Estate is the main appearance spot, and they appear in the capital from time to time.”

It was a cheerful voice, as if talking to a student who answered a question correctly.

‘This guy…’

“Did the surviving monsters migrate from the north?”

I made my own inferences and tapped the table with my fingernails.

Lucas’s gaze went to my fingernails, then back to me.

“No. I don’t think so.”

It was a resolute voice, as if convinced of his denial.

“…Why?”

“According to the report of the military corps, no monsters have ever been found in the northern area. If the surviving monsters of the subjugation moved, it’s normal for them to be seen moving or for their movement to leave traces… There was nothing like that. So, the monsters that are appearing in the capital and territory right now seem to have literally risen from the ground or fallen from the sky, as they’re appearing so suddenly. ”

I glanced at him and fixed my eyes on the red tea water. I heard an important story in my own way, so I needed time to organize my thoughts.

However, Lucas opened his mouth again without giving me the chance to.

“Monsters who suddenly appear out of nowhere. In addition, their locations are the capital and the White Estate that is the second-most developed next to the capital. In this situation, everyone is bound to be tired.”

‘Yes, it is. Of course. They must be tired.’

The peace that lasted for 12 years is starting to crack, but why our estate has become the center of it all… In the midst of peace, my family who was managing the land, which was where the misfortune began, must have been busy.

While I spent time lying in bed and leisurely pursuing my hobbies, they must have been busy working.

I tapped the teacup once.

The tea water rippled with small waves. I quietly watched it until it calmed down before opening my mouth.

“A person with no ability is better off staying still. It’s easy to get angry if I get greedy for things that are beyond my ability. At least, that’s what I think.”

Lucas suddenly looked at me while nodding his head. I raised my gaze to meet the puzzled eyes, then tapped the teacup again.

“But, as of today, that’s a bit annoying. I can’t help my family… by being an incompetent person. Since I have no ability, I just have to keep my mouth shut and look at the situation pretending not to know about it.”

I tapped the teacup again.

The tea water rumbled incessantly.

“If I had been a little more helpful, I could have shared a little of the family’s hard work.”

It was a murmur that sounded like a confession.

It was comfortable not to do anything. That way, there was nothing that people wanted from me.

‘I have no regrets in life, so just let me do that. Honestly, how annoying.’

I could say that I have lived my life as Selena very satisfactorily until now.

However, not right now. Until I would get sick, I would live with my family.

Yes, I would live like that, next to them… It felt pretty bitter that I couldn’t do anything alone.

It was really funny. How funny. That I was thinking about this.

Obviously, even breathing was troublesome when I first fell into this world. Life was scary and tiring, so I tried to run away from the world, using Selena’s wish as an excuse.

I tried to quit everything.

I was like that, but how did I become like this before I knew it?

Lonely in an empty house, waiting for my family and greeting them in their arms.

I feel so bitter about not having to do anything. Damn, when did this happen?

Really, this was unpredictable.

A moment of silence followed.

I had been immersed in pessimistic thoughts for the first time in a long time, and Lucas just looked at me quietly.

The voice that broke the silence was Lucas’s.

“Tomorrow, all the members of the Ducal family have decided not to attend the ball.”

Suddenly, tomorrow…?

It was a random statement, but it was also an interesting one. As high-ranking nobles in the pro-emperor faction, I thought they would participate for three days in a row… I stopped tapping the teacup and looked up at Lucas.

“Everyone is very tired, and when we go back to the estate, it will be overflowing with things to take care of, so we are going to take a day off.”

Oh, of course. After the ball, they must return to the estate. After that, another busy day would follow.

In fact, to others, it might have seemed like a luxury to come to the capital and attend the ball at a time like this.

People tended to evaluate only what they saw on the outside.

At least it was an imperial ball, so it served as a sufficient justification… If it had been on a different schedule, we would have been stoned.

“That’s good.”

When I answered in a mutter, Lucas rested his chin on the table in a leisurely manner.

His two round eyes were shining as if they could look right through people.

Anyway, he was like a snake.

As if he had noticed my thoughts, his red lips went up in an arc. It looked as if a red tongue would stick out from the shallowly open row of lips.

“In the carriage, we talked about what to do tomorrow.”

Wasn’t tomorrow supposed to be a day off?

“Tomorrow… Aren’t you all resting at home?”

“No. Tomorrow we will all go out together.”

“You said they were taking a break?”

“That is a break.”

That? Going out? Oh… I really didn’t understand it, but in the end, each person’s way of resting was different.

I nodded again, recalling the importance of respecting taste, but suddenly felt a strange sense of incongruity and blinked my eyes.

No, if we were going out together for a while…

“Me too?”

“Of course.”

Earlier, I didn’t hear anything from my family…?

After talking for a while with tired but excited faces, they went back to their respective rooms, and I was not informed of tomorrow’s schedule.

No, was I? They should have been able to trust me.

In the middle of the struggle between my ego and my memories, I suddenly thought about something.

Whether I had heard it from my family or not, what was the matter? The only thing that mattered was that I could help my family at this point.

By accompanying them where they wanted to go together without saying a word.

‘Wow, that’s a huge help.’

Sarcastically to myself, I put my arms on the table and rested my chin on the table like Lucas did.

As I took the same posture as his, Lucas tapped the teacup just like I did earlier.

“As we talked about tomorrow’s schedule, everyone looked happy. Especially when…”

His words trailed off. He looked at me with the same mischievous face I had seen yesterday, and opened his mouth in a calm voice that did not match his expression.

“When talking about you, Selena.”

“…Talking about me?”

“Yes, about you. Where we should go with you tomorrow, what we should do together, how we would cheer her up… Things like that. When we talked about you, the fatigue in the carriage quickly turned cheerful.”

I could see the smiling faces of my family members talking about me. Certainly at dinner or on a regular basis they must have been smiling with that expression.

With genuine delight.

“That’s what you are. An existence that makes people happy just by being there.”

How could such sweet words come out of this man’s mouth?

He said he wasn’t drunk, but the thought that he might actually be drunk struck me in the head.

Whether he knew what I was thinking or not, Lucas was just smiling.

Then he pointed at me with the long finger that had been tapping on a teacup.

Suddenly, when I shut my mouth, wondering what the meaning of this finger pointing at me was, a light laugh leaked from the other side.

“You are enough as you are. So don’t push yourself.”

Ah, that was really like the line of a male lead. At the same time, it was an unsuitable line for Lucas.

I stared blankly at him, who had repeatedly spoken unanswered words, then picked up the cooled teacup and drank the tea.

It felt like my dry throat was welling up a little.

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