Yan Yan

Chapter 25.2 – Hotel

Su Yan was stunned for a moment and understood the real meaning of Bai Xingfan’s question. “Whatever the other people’s opinions, Bai Xingfan and I will never be suitable.”

She sighed softly. “Because I don’t live at the top of society. If I was born into an upper-class family, then no matter whether I use cheap or luxury goods, others will think that I should be taken for granted and even feel that I am down-to-earth, but I don’t have such a good background, and I don’t have such a good mentality to despise other people’s eyes and opinions, so I can only try my best to package myself as a shining person, work hard to make money, buy bags and lipsticks, and don’t let others look down on me.”

However, Bai Xingfan did not agree with Su Yan’s idea. If everything was done to cater to the eyes of others, then living was too tiring, just like his mother. When he was young, he often heard his mother say, “You are the grandson of Bai’s family. If you don’t work hard and make progress, others will laugh at you and your parents!” His mother had lived in the eyes of others all her life and even used this thinking mode to imprison his growth trajectory, so he couldn’t accept this kind of thinking at all.

“No one will look down on you, only you will look down on yourself.” He didn’t know whether he was speaking to Su Yan or his mother.

Su Yan sighed again and kept telling herself in her heart, ‘Don’t be tempted, it’s impossible.’

“If you were me, you would understand.” Her tone was calm and frank, without any teasing or sarcasm, “Our family is from the countryside, and I only came to Dongfu when I was fourteen.” She had never mentioned anything about her childhood to Bai Xingfan before, and this was the first time. “My classmates called me a village girl and laughed at my dress and accent.”

Su Yan’s self-esteem was damaged during her adolescence. Even though so many years had passed, she still felt a sense of shame from the bottom of her heart when she mentioned it again. In other words, the unbearable experience in junior high school seemed to have been imprinted in her soul, and every time it was mentioned, it was still fresh in her memory, as if it just happened today. So she was very afraid of being laughed at again.

“Has anyone ever laughed at you like that?” She had already guessed the answer when she asked the question—it must be no. He was born into a rich upper-class family. Who would dare to laugh at him?

“Why not?” Bai Xingfan replied.

Su Yan was startled and looked at him in surprise.

“Before she married my father, my mother was a young actress,” said a composed-looking Bai Xingfan. “She wasn’t really well-known at the time, and her profession was considered a low-level occupation at that time.” She was pregnant with Bai Xingfan first, and then she married into the Bai family. He wasn’t sure if his mother did it on purpose, but he did become a stepping stone for his mother to marry into a wealthy family, otherwise, his grandparents would never agree, “There are many people who are jealous of her, and there are many people who laugh at her.  When I was younger, many of my friends would claim without hesitation that I was the son of an actor.”

Su Yan opened her mouth slightly, her expression full of disbelief.

Bai Xingfan didn’t change his face. “My mother doesn’t mind if people say she is an actress, so she has been working hard to get rid of this title all her life. I am one of the beneficiaries of her efforts. But my father, I, and my younger brother never cared about her origin, only she cares.”

Su Yan could probably understand Bai Xingfan’s thinking mode now, but she could also understand his mother. Sometimes, the sense of inferiority and cowardice were engraved in the bones because the birth couldn’t be changed and the growth experience couldn’t be changed.

She thought, ‘It’s not that we don’t want to abandon the worldly vision, it’s that we can’t do it. It’s great that we can grow upward, so don’t ask us to grow towards the sun.’

In the final analysis, it was the gap in origin and class that led to differences in ideas and thinking patterns. No one was right, but no one was all right. Therefore, an ordinary girl should not daydream or be tempted, it was her best self-protection.

After realising reality once again, Su Yan decided to change the subject. “Do you need to order something more?” she asked. “I feel like you’re not full.”

Bai Xingfan didn’t say anymore and replied, following her words, “No, I don’t have much appetite.”

“Then I will pay the bill.” As she spoke, she picked up her mobile phone and scanned the QR code to pay.

Have a nice day!