You’re Blocking My Coffin Board

・・・★ᖗ(⪧ᴥ⪦)ᖘ★・・・

(7)

In the evening, Jiang Jiang offered to help Liang Liang retrieve the burial items in exchange for letting him stay overnight. 

Liang Liang hesitated for a while but eventually allowed him to come in.

The large luxurious coffin could easily accommodate two ghosts, but Jiang Jiang’s body kept seeping water, wetting Liang Liang.

Jiang Jiang assured Liang Liang that he would definitely help him retrieve the burial items.

Liang Liang thought that Jiang Jiang might have some expertise in spells and magic since he was a Taoist before he died. He speculated that Jiang Jiang could use some kind of magical technique to retrieve the burial items from a distance.

After a few hours, Jiang Jiang floated with him to the front gate of a Taoist temple, then they drifted into the temple. In an extremely casual and straightforward manner, Jiang Jiang addressed an old Taoist,

“Master, This disciple want to report that Uncle Jin has been grave robbing!”

(8)

Jiang Jiang’s master was a genuine Taoist who could see and capture ghosts. Liang Liang thought that Jiang Jiang’s master would probably recite incantations and draw symbols to deal with the villagers who took his burial items and the fraudulent Taoist.

One minute later, Jiang Jiang’s master took out his mobile phone from his robe and pressed three keys.

“Hello, is this 110? We have someone here involved in grave robbing.”

(9)

“…”

In the afternoon, the police arrived and, based on the identification provided by Jiang Jiang (crossed out) and his master, they found the villagers involved in grave robbing. 

Every burial item was returned intact. The police had originally intended to hand them over to the cultural relics bureau, but Jiang Jiang’s master pulled them aside and said something to them. Then, Jiang Jiang’s master gestured to Jiang Jiang with a hand signal.

“Is your master secretly reciting some spells?” Liang Liang admitted that he had read too many fantasy novels about immortals and tomb-robbing on the mountain.

“Master means,” Jiang Jiang withdrew his gaze, “to let us scare them a bit.”

“These burial items are not ownerless objects. If they are taken away, the vengeful spirits in the coffin will haunt the thief,” the master said with a serious tone.

Immediately after, Jiang Jiang and Liang Liang secretly blew air near the necks of those individuals.

The police felt a cold sensation on their necks and shivered.

“In that case, we won’t hand them over to the country. Give them to the Taoist masters for handling,” 

The master, flicked his dusting brush and slightly bowed saying. “Thank you.”

The group of villagers, including the greedy Uncle, were taken away together and would probably be detained for some time for questioning. Liang Liang’s burial items were successfully retrieved.

In the evening, a meeting was held in the Taoist temple, gathering all the Taoist masters. Liang Liang thought that Jiang Jiang’s master would probably criticize the despicable Taoist and caution his colleagues to learn from this incident.

But then he thought again, no, things probably weren’t that complicated.

Indeed, Jiang Jiang’s master looked at him and Jiang Jiang with satisfaction, then expressed his emotions to the remaining Taoist masters in the temple, “This disciple has turned out well. He returned with a wife not long after his passing. Our Taoist temple belongs to the Righteous sect. Those who can get married should not remain single. Let Jiang Jiang’s wife help you inquire about anyone still single in the cemetery on the mountain.”

“Congratulations, Brother! Congratulations, Brother!” Jiang Jiang’s elder brother was the first to offer his congratulations.

“Congratulations, Uncle! Congratulations, Uncle!” Jiang Jiang’s fellow disciples followed suit.

“Come, Liang Liang, come here and call me Master as well.”

Liang Liang didn’t want to call him that originally.

Whoever wanted to acknowledge this engagement could go ahead and do so.

But the Taoist masters in the temple specially prepared a grand feast for him, a table full of delicious dishes, and Liang Liang couldn’t help but drool.

It smelled so good.

“Master!” Liang Liang shouted loudly.

“Ah,” the master was overjoyed.

“I haven’t asked you what kind of ghost you are,” the master asked kindly.

Liang Liang sat before the memorial tablet, enjoying his meal, and took a moment to lift his head and reply.

“A starving ghost.”[1]

[1] In Chinese folklore and Buddhism, a starving ghost, also known as a hungry ghost, is a supernatural being that is depicted as eternally hungry and always searching for food or sustenance. So that’s why Liang Liang loves food so much.