Face Slapping the General

Title: Face Slapping the General
Author: Superpanda
Translated by Xing
Edits by Ning Ning & Asaki

In this highly developed technological era, it wasn’t a good decision to join the army directly. If you didn’t study in a military academy and weren’t familiar with science and technology, you could only work doing simple jobs and your promotion opportunities were quite limited.

However, Wu Qiao had no other choice.

He enlisted himself into the army directly after graduating, and became a low-level soldier after passing a few simple checks. Low-leveled soldiers had small chances of going to the battlefield. They just did some auxiliary work such as growing vegetables and raising pigs in military camps, so they weren’t strictly screened like in military academies.

After officially becoming a soldier, one would be interviewed.

Before the interview, Wu Qiao made preparations very seriously, hoping to be assigned a relatively “better” job. He was quite confident about getting a better job, after all, he had excellent grades and a high IQ.

However, the situation backfired. The interviewer had only asked Wu Qiao one question, “Why did you join the military?”

Wu Qiao answered, “Because I want to change the world.”

He was then assigned the worst job— mining.

Saying this job was “the worst”, was mainly because of the extremely harsh mining environment all year round. If the spring breeze was like a mother’s hand, spring in mining grounds was the hand of a cruel stepmother.

Presently, the most widely used energy source was “Qingsha”. Qingsha released a large amount of energy and has been supporting the empire since it was discovered 200 years ago.

Qingsha = green sand

The man was just an ordinary lecturer at an eighteenth-rate university. His friends knew that he liked all kinds of stones since he was young, so they would bring stones from different planets back as gifts whenever they traveled. 200 years ago, Qiu Yanting received a gift one day from a distant planet from a friend. He inadvertently realized that if a specific particle is used to impact the nucleus of the stone, a lot of energy can be generated. Because the stone was green, he named it “Qingsha.”

At that time, traditional resources were facing exhaustion, and a new alternative energy source was urgently needed. Qingsha’s discovery eliminated panic, and has been used by the army and civilians since. Qiu Yanting’s name was written in textbooks, and became a god who saved the world.

Qingsha only existed in a few planets that were all located on the edge of the Empire. Only the imperial government had the authority to mine and deal with the green stone. The Empire didn’t directly export raw Qingsha, but set up a company in the Republic in order to directly control the energy source.

After the Republic’s sudden long-planned declaration of war on the Empire, the Empire had reduced its Qingsha supply to the Republic and increased prices significantly. However, the Republic was already prepared for the war. It had stockpiled a large amount of traditional energy sources and made up its mind to end the war as soon as possible. The loss of energy to the people of the Republic was far greater than the loss of the military. This has always been the case in history. In the period of material shortage, the people of the Republic have always suffered first. Therefore, the Empire was under the pressure of “humanity”, but ultimately gradually resumed energy exports to the Republic. Although the two sides signed an agreement stating that the energy couldn’t be used in the war, it was impossible to know whether the Republic had exploited any loopholes in the agreement.

The mining process of Qingsha was very complicated. Even today there were still imperfections in the pure use of machines to mine it. It was impossible to distinguish and separate the green stone from the surrounding waste with extreme precision, leading to a waste of raw materials. The imperial government used to supervise the company’s hiring of ordinary workers to mine, but, for some reason, the work was handed over to the military.

Wu Qiao has now been mining for a year and a half, and everyone annoyed him.

Wu Qiao always made suggestions to the officials, telling them about new methods he thought could improve the work process and increase efficiency. In fact, among the “miners”, no one except Wu Qiao wanted to improve their working conditions. Everyone just wanted to spend two years mining quietly and then use their status of “veterans” to get benefits and find better jobs. Whether they could dig more wasn’t what they cared about.

That was it. There were hundreds of people in the team and all of them hated Wu Qiao. Whenever he was mentioned, all the comments were “always high-profile” and “he cares too much.”

Wu Qiao’s only friend was Donovan from another team.

“Hey,” Donovan asked curiously in a somewhat gloomy weather, “why were you sent here?”

“Huh?”

“You look very clever.” Generally speaking, people who were sent to the mines were very physically strong and not very clever since there was no use for clever people to do this kind of work.

“…I don’t understand either.” Wu Qiao really didn’t understand. “The interviewer only asked me a question, and then decided to send me here.”

“What was the question?”

“He asked me why I wanted to join the military.”

“How did you answer?”

“I said I want to change the world.” Even now, Wu Qiao still thought he gave a very ordinary answer.

“Hahaha, no wonder you were sent here!” Donovan laughed.

“…”

“Your answer is so annoying!”

“…”

Donovan thought for a while. “But it really sounds like something you would say, so it isn’t surprising that you actually said it.”

“…?” Wu Qiao was a little dazed. Everyone found him annoying, he knew this very well, but he never thought it would be annoying to say he wanted to change the world.

Was he a really an annoying person, regardless of what he does?

While thinking about this very serious question, a hash alarm sounded in their ears. “All personnel should evacuate immediately…”

Wu Qiao raised his head.

At this time, cluster bombs and laser missiles were falling from the sky. The loud noise was deafening. The sky had been torn apart by the beams of laser weapons and the shock wave caused by the bombs swept the surrounding dust, causing layers of air and smoke to envelope the center of the mining ground. All the bombing targets were instantly swallowed by a sea of fire, the pressing heat wave hit everyone’s nerves.

“What’s wrong?” Donovan asked.

“Get down!” Wu Qiao shouted.

Obviously, this mining ground was being attacked.

Then, Wu Qiao heard a “pia”.

He turned his head and saw that behind him was a dilapidated mecha. What he had heard was just the sound of it falling to the ground⸺ the mecha seemed to be fighting hard against the intruders.

After a while, the mecha flew into the sky with a “rou” sound, and it seemed to be going to make a final attack. Unfortunately, it was besieged by its opponents as soon as it appeared in the sky. With a burst of “biubiubiubiu” [1] sounds, the mecha exploded in midair. With a loud noise, various parts scattered, and the wreckage spread in an area with at least a kilometer.

“My God…” Donovan covered his mouth.

“Hurry and hide in the nearest mine!” Wu Qiao said to Donovan.

“What about you?”

“I have something else to do.”

“What’s the matter?” Donovan asked.

Wu Qiao didn’t answer, but hunched over and left quickly.

He had a very strange feeling that he had to go see where the mecha fell just now.

It fell close, so it didn’t take long for Wu Qiao to reach his destination. Because of the heavy mecha’s landing, all the surrounding vegetation had been skewed.

In the rubble, Wu Qiao saw a man leaning against a tree trunk.

He was wearing an imperial military uniform and he had blood on his face and body, he seemed unable to stand up.

Wu Qiao thought to himself, Sure enough, the mecha that had rushed to the sky was on autopilot. The people inside had escaped before that… Since this was a person working for the emperor, he naturally wanted to save him.

“Hey.” Wu Qiao patted his face. “Hold on, I’ll take you to the mine.”

“……Do not touch me.”

Wu Qiao patted his face again. “Open your eyes.”

“You…”

“I’ll take you into the mine.” Wu Qiao repeated, “Try to walk.”

The man looked up to the distance, and said in a very hoarse voice, “I’ll tell you where to go.”

“……huh?”

“Don’t go into the nearest mine, go to another one not far from here.”

“Why?”

“I don’t want to speak too much, just do what I say.” He then closed his mouth, unwilling to utter another word. His physical condition seemed very bad.

Wu Qiao swept his gaze on him.

It seemed that the seriousness of the injury wasn’t low… He looked like the type to always only give orders. It seemed he was completely unaware that he needed to rely on himself to get rid of the current dangerous situation.

Wu Qiao didn’t ask anymore. He was just a low-level soldier, and there wasn’t any reason to ask any questions at all.

They entered a mine.

“Wait a minute.” Wu Qiao said, “There’s some medicine in the mine. I’ll go get some to treat your injuries first.”

“…”

There were no high-level medicines in the mine and no treatment cabins were installed. There were just simple medicines that the miners might use.

Wu Qiao fed the other some anti-infection medicine, sprinkled hemostatic powder on his wounds, and finally injected an analgesic injection. After doing this, Wu Qiao paused, and then asked again, “Should we wait here?”

“No.”

“Then……?”

“There is a passage here, we need to go deep underground.”

“What?” Wu Qiao shook his head,“There’s no passage here, what you said is impossible.”

The man was impatient again. “What would you know?”

“I’ve been here for a year and a half, I know everything—”

Wu Qiao abruptly shut up, because the man was struggling to go deep into the mine.

When he reached a wall, he took something out and did something. The wall in front of him suddenly reorganized and a passage that Wu Qiao had never seen before appeared in front of him.

Wu Qiao’s eyes widened, and the deep secret path reflected in his pupils⸺he never knew there was a secret passage here.

In a not-so-short walk inside, the person entered the long-digit password, performed fingerprint recognition and pupil recognition, and finally entered an empty room.

As soon as Wu Qiao stepped in, he was shocked.

⸻There were four huge mechas in the room.

Wu Qiao was shocked to know that there was such a thing here.

The metal shells reflected cold light, exuding a sense of pressure in the silent room.

“This is…!” Wu Qiao was so surprised that he didn’t know what to say.

“The latest mecha.”

“I was thinking, why are there robots here?!”

“What do you think?”

“Is this a secret research base?!”

“Do you still not understand?”

Wu Qiao couldn’t help but wonder whether this Emperor’s subordinate always wanted to beat him up.

There was a research base here that Wu Qiao had never heard of. Its location here was probably chosen because it was close to the energy source. If another base was built, the continuous transmission of energy may arouse the suspicion of the enemy.

Wu Qiao was silent before asking again, “What do you plan to do when you enter the mecha?”

The man smiled. “The other party’s purpose is these mechas, and they’ll soon find them here. We escape with the best one, and then destroy the remaining three.”

“Destroy…” Wu Qiao repeated the word.

“It’s a fact that the two of us can’t deal with them, and the mine garrison can’t do it either. Now that the mine’s communication system has been destroyed, we must evacuate the mine as soon as possible and explain everything to the supporting fleet⸺ they’re now coming to our location at full speed. The invaders are hiding in mechas we’ve never seen before. They can escape the current surveillance network of the Emperor. We encountered them by chance on the way here.”

“Where is your mothership?” Wu Qiao asked.

The man pressed his lips tightly. “Probably… no longer here”

“……Sorry.”

“Wait for me in front of the mecha on the far left. I’ll turn it on.”

Wu Qiao waited for a long time, when the mecha’s eyes suddenly lit up.

The whole machine seemed to be alive as it activated part by part in a series of system sounds.

Wu Qiao was taken into the inner space of the mecha.

This was his first real contact with a mecha. He had driven them countless times in his dreams before, and now that he was actually sitting inside one, his body was filled with adrenaline.

“It’s called Ya Jiu.”

“Ya Jiu?”

“Yes, Ya Jiu is the name of a famous sword in ancient times.”

Wu Qiao was thinking about the name and he suddenly heard Ya Jiu’s voice. “Body condition scan… failed to meet standards.”

Wu Qiao thought to himself, Does this mean this guy’s injury was too seriou…?

“Idiot!” Wu Qiao saw the injured guy hit the console, “Hurry up!”

The mecha replied ruthlessly, “Body condition scan… failed to meet standards.”

“If you don’t start up now, I will destroy you!”

“Body condition scan… failed to meet standards.”

“…”

In the terrible silence, Wu Qiao risked his life and asked, “What’s wrong?”

“I’m badly injured⸺the mecha program thinks it can’t go to war. It’s certain that it will die if forced to go. This is one of its protection mechanisms.”

“Then…what should we do now?”

He took a deep breath. “I order you to pilot it.”

“Me?!” Wu Qiao’s fingers stiffened.

This kind of thing was a dream come true, but Wu Qiao never thought it would happen in this situation.

“Yes, you.”

Wu Qiao lowered his eyes to look at the console, only feeling his blood surging. He suddenly clenched his fists. “Okay. I’ll do it.”

“Have you ever piloted a mecha?”

“I often play simulation games.”

“…You don’t have any practical experience, yet you just agreed? You’re so bold.”

“…” Wu Qiao did always feel good about himself, believing that he could finally materialize all his dreams. Wu Qiao fell into depression for a long time when he was rejected by the military academy. After that, he immediately felt that this was just a small obstacle in his extraordinary life, and that maybe it was the destined shortcut. He believed that soldiers should be calm and self-sufficient, so he tried his best to stay calm on the outside, but in fact, he was very scared.

He felt that he definitely wouldn’t die here, as for why he couldn’t die… he just couldn’t.

The mecha scanned Wu Qiao. “Body condition scan… meets the minimum standards.”

“…”

“Now, set it up.”

“Ok.”

Wu Qiao heard the person next to him speak again. “Only manual control and voice control are available at the moment. We’ll use the manual controls and synchronize your voice later.”

“Ok.”

“Brainwave manipulation requires long-term training. “There’s absolutely no possibility you can use it.”

“Ok.”

The setup program in front of him popped up and Wu Qiao looked at the first step:

[Input Name]

Wu Qiao used the keyboard to enter his name: Wu Qiao.

After entering his name, his finger stopped in midair. He felt something was wrong.

Turning his head to see what it was, the person behind him was looking at him as if he had seen a ghost!